When we were contemplating our family year of travel back in late 2019 I read that my favourite yoga teacher from my days living in London, Jeff Phenix, was going to be holding a yoga retreat at Ashiyana Retreat in Goa in February of 2020. Returning to India and attending another yoga retreat were two things I had dreamed of doing for a long time. But since having children I had put the dreams aside, thinking of them as something that seemed impossible for a long time to come. But then, somehow, the timing and opportunity just seemed to be too perfect to ignore. I dared to dream that we could actually make it happen, but the doubts kept creeping back into my head. Was India a good place to travel with young children? Was a yoga retreat an appropriate place to take two energetic youngsters when the ambience called for calm and quiet?

In the spirit of ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’ and with encouragement from Jeff that we could make it happen we decided to take the plunge and see what came of it! And I can now say that I am so glad that we did, for it turned out to be one of my most precious life experiences so far and the highlight of our six weeks on the road (not year, as we had planned, thank you COVID!) for Layla and Etienne. They still now talk about the yoga retreat and ask when we can go back!

Welcome ceremony – off to a great start
To mark the beginning of the retreat we all gathered in one of the beautiful, peaceful shalas. It was surrounded by shady trees and enveloped in billowing fabric that made the most magical atmosphere as the late afternoon sun streamed through. Any nervous tension we were feeling quickly melted away as the welcome ceremony, which is a customary way to arrive somewhere in India, began. Andy, Layla and Etienne were encouraged to join in and I will forever hold in my heart the image of my little two year old, enveloped in his father’s lap sitting so still and so serenely receiving a welcome tilaka on his forehead and a garland of marigold around his neck. And Layla, at five years old, maturing so quickly and becoming so independent, sitting cross-legged with her hands in prayer at her chest reciting namaste as she was ‘blessed’ with a red dot on her forehead and a garland of marigold around her neck. Voice so soft and eyes so gentle. I need not have worried that the children would not be welcome. They were revered welcomed with open arms, as sacred beings. It made my heart skip a beat and the breath get caught in my throat. They, I am certain, could feel the reverence of the occasion and the warmth and kindness with which they were being received too.

Ashiyana Retreat
The retreat was held in the stunning, cocoon-like ‘home away from home’ (ashiyana means home in Hindi) that is Ashiyana on Mandrem Beach in north Goa. Walking through the gates felt like taking a giant exhale, the tension melted from our shoulders and a smile grew across our faces as we were welcomed by the staff, the yogic dogs and of course Jeff.

The grounds are dotted with villa accommodation, an open communal dining area, a pool, spa centre, numerous shalas and a welcoming reception area. There were shady paths to wander, bowls of bright flowers to appreciate, marigold-adorned statues to contemplate and it was just a short walk across a bridge to vibrant but not-too-crazy Mandrem town and beach.

The accommodation
We stayed in the cave-like ‘Moon Villa’ which was a great option for our family … although the mezzanine level did make me a little nervous as the kids could potentially fall through the wide open balustrades. Instead of using this as a bedroom and play space we just decided to make it a place to store our suitcases and that deterred the kids from venturing up there too often. There were two double beds on the ground floor which was perfect for Layla, Andy and I and Etienne slept in his travel cot.

Now the most important part, the yoga!
To be honest I was a little nervous about the yoga part of the retreat. Since having Etienne two years prior my return to the mat had taken a long time and my current practice was usually 2-3 days a week at best. I knew Jeff would cater for all levels and that I could just do what I needed but none-the-less the sheer volume of classes (one two and a half hour class, and one two hour class, twice a day, for a week) was a little daunting.

But from the very first early morning class it felt so good! I sat in the shala. Under a billowing white parachute roof. Legs crossed, eyes gently closed. I listened and heard the sound of birds cheeping in the trees. A soft breeze ruffled the leaves over head. I sat and I breathed. I heard the distant sound of a dog barking, of a broom being swept across the ground. As time went by my sense of self melded with my surroundings. I smelt breakfast being cooked, the soft whisper of voices and I felt peace.

The classes were a mix of meditation, pranayama, asana, some strong, some mellow, some exploring chakras and energy flow, always with a playful style and an invitation to ‘explore your edge’. There were days my muscles ached and I felt tired and it felt like hard work, but even that was a good feeling as it felt like I was making progress.

On top of the retreat Ashiyana also offers a program of daily classes and evening classes and I attended a yoga nidra session one night which was my first experience of this style of class and was deeply relaxing (I think I may have dozed off for a while there!). Practising in such peaceful natural surrounds in mindfully designed shalas was such a treat and I really enjoyed the comraderie which grew amongst the other yogis. It was so nice to share the experience with others.

Mandrem town and beach
During the middle of the day, after yoga and the exquisite yoga brunches (think fresh fruit, thick yoghurt, porridge, homemade bread, raw seed crackers, idli and sambar, eggs, dosa and all sorts of other daily treats, washed down with juice and chai), there was time to make the day your own. I always found this time a little tricky, some days I wished I could find a yoga friend to take off shopping or to the cafe with, or take my book to the beach to read, but as I was travelling with my family I wanted to give Andy a chance to do what he wanted for a while and to spend some time with Layla and Etienne. Although I did also make sure that I got the chance to sneak off to the spa, for a massage, for some lone shopping time too! I can definitely recommend the blissful ‘Ayuvrvedic Bliss Therapy’ treatment at Ashiyana’s Spa and the Marma Massasge at Shanti Ayuverdic Massage Centre in the main street.

Goa is like a little slice of laid back calm in the midst of the craziness of India and Mandrem even more so. It was a sleepy little village, essentially just a dusty main road, but with enough character and vibrancy to make it interesting. I loved the simple joy of walking down the street chatting to the shop keepers. If I was on my own they would ask where my children were. If Layla and/or Etienne were with me they would gently greet them … and revel in Layla’s enthusiasm to look in their shop. I loved sitting in the coffee shop watching the world go by, the hot sun intensifying the dreamy feeling of being somewhere so different and exotic. Ahh India!

I would have loved some more time to spend on the beach but we did go down for sunset most nights, we had a night out at a beach bar on our last evening and Andy, Layla and Etienne spent every morning playing on the beach. It was a perfect place for a family excursion whilst I was at yoga class.

Sunset sessions
After the last yoga session of the day and before the always delicious dinners we would often head down to Mandrem Beach. End of the day swims, as the sky turned a deep golden and the sun set over the salty horizon were definitely a highlight of the week. Floating in the warm, inky water or jumping the waves. Watching Layla and Etienne play in the shallows … and occasionally dive into the water fully clothed. Chatting with my fellow yogis about the deep experiences of practising yoga or simply comparing the price of sarongs on the beach. Daily rituals of retreat and travel that make these times so precious.

Excursions into India
Of course one of the other great things about going on a yoga retreat, especially one abroad, is the chance to explore somewhere new. During the week we attended the colourful Maha Shivrati Festival in Chapora and went souvenir shopping and people watching at the huge Anjuna Market, where I learnt the benefit of shopping for crystals with a very cute little co-shopper! I will save the details for another blog as this one is already jam-packed!

Notes on taking children on a retreat
Before we arrived I was quite concerned that a yoga retreat was not the place for two young children and worried that I was being unfair to both them and the other participants by bringing them along, but the experience turned out to be very positive. The Ashiyana grounds were spacious enough that if there were hanging around the retreat and not on the beach there was enough space for them to play hide and seek or build nature cubbies without disturbing others and the enclosed nature of the retreat meant I did not have to be too concerned with them getting lost (Layla knew her way around better than I did). There were two occasions when I thought I had lost them, once I found Etienne happily sitting with the spa receptionists whilst Andy was having a massage, the other time they both disappeared and I found them at reception watching the film clip to the Hindi song ‘Layla’ on the computer with the staff. I think the nicest thing, for them and us, was just how welcomed they felt by both the staff and the other participants. Layla made lots of friends she liked to have a chat with when she saw them and they were both looked after and treated so beautifully. They joined in at meal times and came on excursion and Layla even particpated in the last yoga class of the week.

For me, personally it was lovely to have them along and to experience a little of something I love, but I did feel torn between giving them my attention in my free time versus taking time out for myself to do what I wanted or to connect with my fellow yogis. But my time to go on retreat on my own will come!